Zephyr Hill

A Family Blog

8 Ways to Motivate a Reluctant Potty Trainer

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Before you give up on a child that seems unwilling or unable to learn, try these troubleshooting tips for motivating reluctant trainers. And feel free to ask me any questions you like, as I’ve trained eight children so far and it wasn’t always smooth sailing. Next up is two-year-old Camille!

1. Get rid of diapers

Let your child know in advance that all the diapers (and super absorbent trainers) are going away. This helps motivate both of you because there ARE going to be messes on the floor, and the couch, and pretty much anywhere else your learner finds himself.

2. And…..bring diapers back!

Sometimes, the opposite approach works! If potty training has been a rocky experience, talk to your child about bringing the diapers back again in a very matter-of-fact way. “There have been a lot of accidents this week, so we’re going to get the diapers out again.” Some children may surprise you by first accepting and then completely rejecting the proposition, because they see it as a big regression and don’t want to go that far in the other direction. The idea of going back to a “baby” may suddenly seem very unappealing!

Speaking of trainers, buying cloth will save you LOADS of money. Plus, they are softer and more comfortable. My favorites are the affordable bamboo and cotton pull-ups from Imagine Baby; the sides snap fully open to make clean-up easy and there’s a waterproof layer for extra protection. Even better, you can buy a 3-pack for just $29.99!

Imagine Pull-Up Trainer, available at Nicki’s Diapers

3. Re-examine the reward

If candy and stickers aren’t working, go for a more tempting reward. This is something that your child is just DYING to have or do. Make it very clear what this prize is, and remind him of it often. If it’s a toy, you could set it in view but completely out of reach.

BUT not all rewards have to be expensive. Finding the right thing may be all you need. I bought our daughter Ingrid a beautiful little doll with dress-up clothes and set it at the top of our bathroom cabinet. And for many weeks after that, with that tempting prize in plain view, she continued to have accidents. After expressing frustration one day to my teenage daughter, she replied, “Mama, you know Ingrid will do anything for a soft drink.” It seemed absurdly simple, but Catherine was right. Every time her big sister promised her a Coke, Ingrid dutifully went to the bathroom. In just two days she was fully trained. I still gave her that doll, by the way.

And don’t miss the fact that training pants themselves can be a reward. After leaving diapers behind, let your child pick out his favorite prints and colors for the potty training process. Wink Diapers is my go-to source for adorable, affordable bamboo trainers (shown below) in a huge selection of colors. And you can use my code zephyr20 to get a discount of 20% off your purchase!

4. Do not power struggle

Too many times it ends up being a battle of wills, especially with an older child who knows what to do, but just won’t. It’s the same with sleep; you can’t force it on them. Put you can certainly grease the wheels.

So quit talking about it and leave potty-training in his hands for a while. Walk away from the whole thing (this helps ease your frustration and resentment, too, which is a plus!). Don’t remind your child to go. Don’t say anything when he has an accident. Don’t reward or praise him when he does go. Think of it as “his thing.” Some go-getters will react to this by training themselves. In the end, they might have just wanted ownership of the process.

5. Fluids and fiber

Make sure you rule out possible roadblocks to training like constipation and urinary tract infections. We had this happen over the years with two of our girls; both UTI’s and a very full gut can cause accidents/leaking.

Speaking of night-time accidents Nicki’s has stuffable trainers that are great for sleep (below).

Offer lots of their favorite beverages on training days so that when you ask “Do you need to go?” they will more likely answer “Yes!”

Pictured: Nicki’s Brand Overnight (Stuffable) Pull-Up Trainers

6. Forget the mistakes

Every child has setbacks during potty training, but don’t let discouragement (for either of you) take hold. Falling off a few times is part of learning to ride a bike. Mixing up letters just happens when you’re starting to read. And even the best piano players miss a note sometimes. Whenever an accident happens, move on and encourage your child to do the same. Always have a “We’ll do better next time” attitude to ensure your child’s training will not be hampered by distress or anxiety.

7. Too many goals?

The whole potty training thing can seem overwhelming to toddler. It’s something hard that big kids do. Or maybe your child finds it boring and not worth their time. If your child is dragging his feet, give him very simple, attainable goals to work towards so he can experience successes. Some ideas:

  • While he’s playing set a timer. Say “when the timer beeps, I want you to stop playing and go try to use the potty. Then you can come right back to your toys.”
  • Whenever he has an accident, give him something easy to do, even if it’s just flushing the mess down the potty. Thank him for helping.
  • See how many pairs of underwear he can keep dry one day. Set them out in the morning so he can see how many there are, and issue the challenge.
  • Play his favorite song and say “Every time we hear this, we’ll visit the potty!”

8. Remove the microscope

Your child may be willing, but not at all like you breathing down his neck during the learning process. For this child, make everything more accessible so he can handle the basics alone. Designate one diaper pail that he can toss soiled underwear in. Provide wet wipes which clean better than dry toilet paper (limit your child to 2 or 3 and stress that they go in the trash). Teach him to empty the bowl if using a child-sized potty. Have him put away all his clean underwear. A bonus to this approach is that the more your child does on his own, the more he will be motivated to train. He’d rather be playing than cleaning up messes and helping with laundry, right?

Questions? Tips to share of your own? Leave me a comment!

And speaking of shopping for trainers, have you entered the Amazon gift card giveaway that I posted yesterday?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This article was previously published at Tots Family, and has been revised and updated.

Trying Cloth Diapers for Your Newborn? Here are My 7 Favorites!

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I’m due in April and so it’s almost time to pull out the newborn cloth diapers again. If you’re interested in trying cloth for a newborn, I’ve got lots of great recommendations and tips for you. We’ve been using cloth for our new babies since Erik arrived 8 years ago, and it’s easier and more economical than you may think.

Have you bookmarked my Cloth Diaper Resource Page?

These are the brands I’ll be using the most – my favorites after cloth diapering 4 newborns:

The Thirsties Stay Dry All in One

This is such a trim and cute diaper for the first few weeks of life. It’s made with a plush microfleece and microterry and a waterproof outer. Choose from either snaps or aplix (velcro). I do like the aplix because it’s SO easy to use with a wiggly newborn. It’s as close as you can get to the convenience of a disposable.

You can find this adorable diaper for $16.50 at Nicki’s Diapers and Sweetbottoms Baby Boutique.

Nicki’s Newborn Bamboo All in One

Designed to fit from 5 to 13 pounds, the diaper is waterproof on the outside and lined with bamboo on the inside. It includes a semi-attached 70% bamboo/30% cotton terry 4 layer insert that snaps into the back. The insert measures 10 x 3.5 inches. The inside of this diaper is very soft and snuggly, and the “rolled” elastics around the legs are really gentle.

Amazingly, this bamboo diaper is only $11.95 at Nicki’s!

 

Diaper Rite Newborn All in One

Hands down, this is the most absorbent newborn all-in-one diaper we’ve tried, and yet it’s also one of the least expensive. As a plus, it’s highly adjustable so your baby can wear it well past the newborn stage. It includes TWO bamboo inserts and is only $12.95 (the discontinued version is one sale for just $9.72!) exclusively at Diaper Junction.

Diaper Rite Newborn Cover and Prefolds

Diaper Rite’s newborn cover fits beautifully on a tiny newborn body and is very sturdy and durable. The ones I’ve used on two babies so far are still going strong, although that doesn’t mean I might not pick up a *few* new colors for my baby this April!

The newborn covers are just $9.95 and fit past the newborn stage if you have a small to average baby, so you really get your money’s worth!

You can get free shipping over $35 on all your Diaper Rite/Diaper Junction purchases.

Nicki’s Muslin Flats

Nicki’s Muslin Flats are a simple and cheap option. For $15.95 at Nicki’s you get 6 of these beautiful white flat diapers, making them more economical than prefolds or fitteds because you they serve double-duty later as nursing cover-ups, burps cloths or rags. My favorite way to use a flat with a newborn is the Mini Pad Fold.

These flat diapers are pure white, and so soft and smooth!

When your baby is older, try stuffing the small Nicki’s flats in a pocket diaper:

Buttons Newborn Cover

Buttons covers are made of soft, smooth and very durable waterproof PUL, and each has a cute embroidered button on the back.  Features include double gussets, a wipeable interior and a very affordable price tag of $11.00. The newborn cover has two sets of snaps at the waistband. This is a trim cover and works best with small Buttons inserts, newborn prefolds and flats (not fitted diapers).

You’ll find the largest selection of Buttons colors and prints at their online shop.

Newborn cloth diapers aren’t just tiny and cute – they fit beautifully and will save a lot of money in the long run. And because they aren’t used for very long, you’ll be able to pack them away for the next child, saving even more money! Have you cloth diapered a newborn? What were your favorite brands and styles?

 

 

Bebeboo Cloth Diapers: The “Choice” AI2 + a Giveaway

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We’ve tried many styles of cloth diapers over the years, and one of my top picks is the All-in-Two because it’s versatile and user-friendly. Today I’ll introduce you to a work-from-home, mother-owned brand that’s gained popularity in this age of “gray market” diapers for being affordable, adorable and durable: Bebeboo Diapers! 

Owner Thea, who hails from Las Vegas, generously sent us an assortment of Bebeboo products to review; today’s focus is on the Choice AI2 and the Fine Bib.

The print you see below (Romeo’s Song) is a tribute to Thea’s father who was lost to Lymphoma. Music was an important part of his life, and naturally made its way into this lyrical design.

Features: You get a lot with this system for a price point of $17.95:

  • Adjusts to fit babies from 10 to 35 pounds
  • Includes a 5-layer snap-in bamboo insert, which is also adjustable
  • Pocket openings in the front and back
  • Crossover snaps (for a snugger fit at the waist)
  • Hip snaps (to prevent sagging)
  • Lined with soft athletic wicking jersey (poly knit)

Use the snaps on the insert to shorten the length for smaller babies. You can attach the insert at front or back, because there are receiver snaps at both ends.

Performance: I mentioned that an AI2 diaper is versatile and the Bebeboo Choice is no exception. The included insert can be stuffed inside the pocket, snapped in, or just laid in like you would a diaper cover. I tested the diaper all three ways and was happy with the absorbency and fit every time. As is, 10-month-old Camille can wear it 3 hours. Keeping it snapped in is my preference; the diaper basically functions like an “All-in-One” and the insert stays put in the laundry. Couldn’t be easier!

If you opt for stuffing inside the pocket, the insert does agitate out on its own in the wash, so you don’t have to get your hands dirty pulling it out.

Now, the drawback of a thick, absorbent bamboo insert is its dry time. That’s just the way of cloth diapers, though. Lots of thirsty layers mean you can change your baby less frequently….and wait longer for the diaper to come out of the dryer. There are ways around this, like if Bebeboo were to have 2 thin inserts in place of one, but then you’ve got more moving parts in the system. Honestly, I like the way Thea has kept it simple. Longer dry times are not a deal breaker for me.

Fit: The double snaps at the waist assure a neat and tidy fit across the front, which I really like. And if the leg openings are too snug or too loose, you can angle that bottom snap to suit your baby. That third (top) snap you see is designed to prevent wing droop; that’s what happens when a diaper starts to sag downward on an active baby. It doesn’t eliminate it totally (sometimes the bottom of the wings will sneak out a bit) but it certainly does help. Using these extra hips snaps is totally optional, by the way.

Camille is 10 months old and about 18 pounds now, so an average sized baby. The Bebeboo AI2 fits as expected, with 2 more rise settings to go. I see us getting a lot of use from this diaper well into the potty training stage.

Bebeboo Fine Bib: Here’s a practical and affordable way to enjoy some of the new Bebeboo prints, even if you’re maxed out on diapers! For just $7.50 the Fine bib features an easy-to-clean waterproof PUL outer and athletic wicking jersey inner lining. There are two snap settings at the neck and a roomy food catcher pocket.

The only thing I would change about these wonderful bibs is to make the tag a bit smaller, so it wouldn’t distract at all from the print. You can shop Bebeboo bibs here!

What sets Bebeboo Diapers apart from the rest?

  • The choice of materials is very forward-thinking. Bamboo is soft and highly absorbent; athletic wicking jersey is a superior lining material (in my opinion) to the typical fleece or microsuede. And not many inserts are adjustable.
  • Bebeboo colors and fabrics run the gamut and are sure to please just about any aesthetic. Some diaper brands have a “look” and they stick to it, but that can be very confining. Take a look at Bebeboo’s online shop and you’ll see that choices range from classic (Here Comes the Sun) to modern (Nature’s Gold) to whimsical (Arabian Nights).
  • Thea works with a small factory overseas to mutually support another small business. Her limited releases allow more oversight of product quality and result in less production waste.

You can buy with confidence because Bebeboo diapers are tested by a Consumer Product Safety Commission Laboratory. and have passed all relevant CPSIA standards.

I really love Bebeboo’s friendly approachable style, especially to those families that are learning the ropes. “New to cloth?” Thea asks on Instagram, “Let us help!”

Shop Bebeboo cloth diapers today
and check out the 30-day trial program

Use zephyrhill10 to get 10% off your purchase!

Visit Bebeboo Diapers on Facebook, and say “hi” on Instagram!

Giveaway: Enter to win a a shop credit of $25, courtesy of Bebeboo Cloth Diapers! Use the entry form below. Open to residents of US, Canada and Mexico. Good luck!

 

 

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10 Reasons That Cloth Diapers Leak (and How to Troubleshoot)

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Any diaper can leak, disposable or cloth, but cloth diapers tend to have a better track record and brands often tout this in their marketing. That’s why parents may be taken aback when a cloth diaper leaks. They think it’s “abnormal,” which isn’t really true, because leaks are not always due to user error or a problem with the diaper itself.

Take a look at this list of possible causes and you’ll see what I mean. I’ll also share some troubleshooting tips.

ABSORBENCY

Placement: The absorbent part of the diaper may simply be in the wrong place. Boys tend to wet more up front, girls in the back, but it’s not a hard and fast rule, so experiment and see what works best. Next time you have a leak, play Sherlock Holmes and use your hand and your eyes to gauge where most of the wetness end up. If you have a baby boy, make sure things are lined up straight (anatomically-speaking), so that the mess doesn’t go to one side or the other (this usually causes leg leaks).

Fabric: Cotton, bamboo, hemp and microfiber have different properties. Some absorber faster than others. For example, if your baby floods a diaper very quickly, the slow and steady absorbency of hemp may not be best. Try bamboo instead. Or a microfiber insert topped with fleece or bamboo. My favorite “combo” insert is the Thirsties Stay Dry Duo, available at Nicki’s with free shipping.

Quantity: You’d be amazed at what might be necessary to hold a heavy wetter. Sometimes you’ll need two boosters. Or a change of fabric (hemp instead of cotton, for instance). As long as your cover or diaper is roomy enough, you should be able to add additional absorbency as needed. Geffen Absorbers are my top choice because they don’t add very much bulk. Plus, they are USA-made.

Ages and Stages: Babies’ habits and behaviors change as they grow. A toddler might start holding it in and then letting it go all at once. This can cause diapers that were working fine to suddenly start leaking, even if the absorbency level is spot on. And of course, they’re output is simply going to increase as they get older. The change might happen quite suddenly, and your first clue would be leaks.

FIT

Legs: Are they snug enough? After the diaper is on, use your finger to ensure that the leg openings are snug but not constricting. There shouldn’t be gaps. If your baby has very skinny legs, snap up the rise, and also try grasping the wings on either side and pulling them up on either side, so they stick up a little past the waistband. This Thirsties video demonstrates.

Waist: Does it sag down or gape open? Adjust the waist snaps first, and if more fine tuning is needed, trying going up or down a setting in the rise.

Compression: A common cause of wicking is your child’s clothing fitting too closely to the waistband or leg openings. “Onesies” are notorious for getting damp in the area right around the leg gussets. Make sure your child’s clothing isn’t restrictive, do more frequent changes (before saturation point) or let him wear the diaper with no bottoms on. Another option is to snap only the middle snap of the Onesie; leave the two at the sides undone and they won’t press against the leg gussets.

Put on an extra absorbent diaper when he’s going to be strapped tightly into a carseat because the buckle will press against it.

CARE

Repelling: Stuff can build up on your diapers and cause them to be less absorbent. Could be ammonia or rash cream. Follow the manufacturer’s instructions to “strip” your diapers and get a clean start.

Prepping: Certain diaper fabrics get more absorbent with use and washing. These include natural fibers like cotton and hemp. Synthetics like microfiber and bamboo don’t apply. Make sure you fully prep natural diapers according to the manufacturer’s instructions; they are not all the same, and there’s not a one-size-fits-all answer.

QUALITY

Defects and Damage: Every once in a while, it happens. Cloth diapers can and do leak because of faulty workmanship, whether intentional or accidental. Poor quality PUL (the thermal plastic backing), tiny holes in the stitching, or poor design can all lead to problems not explainable by any of the above, so reach out to the shop you purchased from for help and warranty claims. Be sure to have clear pictures ready of the problem areas, or diaper damage.

If you see consistent wicking/leaks from the area around the sewn-on tag (not all brands have this), check with the manufacturer and see if they advise sealing the PUL. If the damage occurred by accident (like in the washing machine), take a look at these diaper repair tutorials.

If you bought used and it’s a case of the seller not disclosing a flaw, use Paypal’s buyer protection process to file a claim. Screenshots of the transaction (i.e. a picture of the Facebook post with description) will help your case tremendously.

And since no diaper is immortal, it’s going to fail at some point, but you can still find ways to repurpose.

If you have any leaky diaper troubleshooting questions OR tips to share, please use the comment feature below!

 

Cloud Cloth Diapers Review

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Note: Cloud Cloth Diapers is no longer in business.

I came across Cloud Cloth Diapers this spring while looking for something unique and affordable for Camille. Nine children and living on one income have a way of making you really keep an eye on your budget!

Over the years, many work-from-home mothers have been featured at my blog, so naturally I wanted to share the Cloud Cloth Diapers story with you.

Owner Ari Cooper told me “I always knew that I wanted to run a business but could never figure out what. When I found out I was having my second child, I knew that I wanted to cloth diaper…One day I decided that I was going to sell them and that way people would get them in a few days instead of weeks [i.e. from overseas]…I wanted to give up so many times this past year and a half but the entrepreneurial bug keeps biting me and keeps me motivated.”

Cloud Cloth Diapers are imported from China, using several different manufacturers. With ethics and safety in mind, Ari assured me “They all have provided me with documents showing their chemical testing reports, CPSIA, and SGS reports. In addition I am planning a trip to visit them all later this year since I want to see for myself where the diapers come from. I have built relationships with all of my account managers so they are very comfortable with sending me photos and sharing information with me.”

I’m impressed that Ari is so forthright and conscientious about the products she sells.

And now for the diaper review!

For 7-month-old Camille, I bought three different Cloud styles: a cover, a pocket and an all-in-one. All three are one-size.

My order was beautifully packaged with a ribbon and hand-written name tag. I cut the dark blue satin ribbon in half and gave one to each of my little girls for their braids and ponytails. 🙂

To stand out from the crowd a little bit, Ari shared with me that she packages orders “like a gift, instead of just sending them off in the plastic bags. It takes A LOT more time, and little bit more money but I think it makes each customer feel a little more appreciative of their purchase.”

Cloud all-in-one diapers have either a microsuede (white) or charcoal bamboo (gray) inner lining; I chose the latter. For my pocket diaper, I ordered the cotton/bamboo insert for $4.50. Other choices include hemp, bamboo and charcoal bamboo.

For just $6.50, the one size diaper cover has several nice features: double leg gussets, double snaps at the waist and flaps at the front and back for either holding inserts or providing an extra layer of waterproof material.

Camille is 7 months old and about 16 pounds. There’s still a lot of room to grow in this cover. There are 4 size settings using the adjustable rise.

Cloud pocket diapers retail for $8.50 – adding on an insert starts at just $1.00. The lining is white suedecloth and the back opens for stuffing.

My bamboo/cotton insert shrank a little in the wash, as you would expect, and the edges don’t stay perfectly flat after that.

I really like the fit and look of the new square tabs on Cloud pocket diapers; they were changed in response to customer requests. There are double snaps on the wings, plus a double set of hip snaps. I’ve been only using one of those, though, and the diaper stays secure. As with any pocket diaper, the absorbency level depends on what you stuff inside. The bamboo/cotton insert I chose holds Camille for about 2 hours.

The inner lining of the all-in-one diaper hides stains really well, and is soft and fleecy. There’s a pocket opening at the front which allows you to add extra inserts. Note: If you opt for the AIO with microsuede instead of charcoal bamboo, the wing snap configuration will look like the pocket diaper pictured above.

Since 3 absorbent layers of microfiber are sewn into this diaper, it takes a little more time to dry as compared to the pocket style. Cloud Cloth AIO diapers are just $9.00 each.

The AIO and pocket are very similar in fit, but you probably already know I lean towards the convenience of an AIO, so that’s the diaper we’ve been using the most. I also like that the wings are a bit narrower. To my surprise, Camille can wear the AIO several hours easily without leaking, and there’s plenty of room to add an extra doubler on top.

I love all the prints we got: snails, bugs, iguanas. Cloth diapering certainly does not have to be a mundane chore in 2019! Have fun shopping Cloud Cloth and see the range of prints and colors Ari is offering right now. (PS: She also has some diapers on clearance for $3.75 – yes, you read that correctly!)

And last but not least, Cloud Cloth now has two styles of roomy, backpack style diaper bags available for pre-order. Ari carefully oversaw each design detail, and they are only $45, with a 1 year limited warranty included.

Diapering with Cloud Cloth is not just affordable, it’s fun, and you get personal service from a friendly and approachable WAHM. Ari cares a lot about quality and is very responsive to her customers. Just recently, a new payment option was added called Klarna. If you spend $35 or more, you can split your purchase in to 4 equal payments with no credit check, no fees and no interest.

Visit Cloud Cloth Diapers today, or just say “hi” on Facebook!